This is another article advising you on how to live a better life. I strongly believe that everyone deserves living a better life. Everyone told you about that, right?
Well, I also heard about that but I don’t know how to achieve it until my good friend Constance gifted me a copy of How to Live a Good Life, by Jonathan Fields, right before the holidays. As a self-help book addict, I was ready to dive in, not necessarily expecting to learn anything new.
But I did. Fields simplifies the joy of living into three simple buckets: connection, contribution, and vitality.
And what could we possibly value more in this overstimulated, overhyped, over-everything age than the core values of being connected, the joy of giving, and the feeling of being alive?
Here’s how these three elements have the power to transfer you:
A Good Life
I am a person who has connected with books soon due to my emotional absence from family. Since then, I also connect with teachers who noticed my enthusiasm in the classroom and even with the kind social workers who helped our family when we didn’t have any where to live.
Gradually, I formed a relationship with the universe.
As a kid, a local church was kind to us and helped us with free food. My time at Sunday school meant that, traditional religion aside, I created a relationship with a power that was greater than me. I learned about the world as a loving home where everyone belonged, not just the “normal kids” at school.
As an adult, I’ve come to embrace spirituality that makes me feel deeply connected to something bigger. Throughout my failure, I continue to feel an unbreakable connection to the universe. It has saved me in times of despair, and I know it will never leave me.
As an adult, I’m intentional about finding and being around “my people”—those who make me feel safe and loved. I’m looking for that same feeling of connection all these years later.
Do you have your people and that feeling of security in your life?
How you bring your gifts to the world?
It’s about that deep knowing that you’re doing the thing you’re here to do
This question often seems impossible we ask frequently, I know. Bills to pay. Rent due. People to impress with chic vacations. Parents to soothe with an expanding 401(k).
This bucket speaks to me in profound ways. I left a $500K-per-year job at 30 to work as a life coach and writer. This seemed insane at the time, but it felt like it wasn’t even a choice. My instincts guided me, and I knew that it would work out.
You matter. Your contribution matters. If you oppress your reason for being, it will kill you slowly. When your contribution bucket is full, it feels like, “You’re accessing your full potential, your strengths, your gifts… leaving nothing unrealized or untapped.” What’s more vital than that?
Which leads us to…
This is about feeling energized, free from pain, resilient, appreciative, and, well, happy. Vitality is the opposite of depression, anxiety, and suffering. It’s your birthright. But we don’t always feel that way, do we?
Vitality involves a deep mind-body connection. As Fields says, “Your mind and body serve as seamless feedback mechanisms, chemically and electrically.”
Ever notice when you’re in a slump, you don’t want to do things like work out, cook a healthy dinner, or have sex? Your level of vitality directly correlates to all of your decision-making and is deeply driven by how full your buckets of connection and contribution feel.
Vitality is often repressed by fear—fear of the future, of the unknown, of what lies ahead. My favorite quote in Fields’s book is, “Life’s greatest moments live in the space between desire and attainment.” We have no choice but to live with uncertainty. But “without uncertainty, there is no possibility.” Ah, sweet possibility.
Could you imaging starting to embrace possibility over uncertainty? Wouldn’t that make you feel alive?
Beside that, softskill also helps you alot, if you want to know why please read